little bumps become big bumps.

today we take cohen to meet his pre k teacher. he starts pre k monday. im excited for him but really sad o see him go. Im finding it more and more diffcukt to deal with ken being out of a job. this was just suppose to be a little bump. not big one. but now were going on month three with nothing but unemployment andno end in sight. this weekend is stake conference and im singing inthe wemons chior. im excited casue im actully going to be bale to listen to the talks. thre wont be any kids ont the stage with me LOL. I need something to uplift me cause nothing seems to be working. we have had family home eveaning three weeks in a row. but thats nbot helping. famiy prayer, scriptur reading, even made to all three hours of church for a month. still feel down. im tryiong so hard to figure out whats making me feel so down. Im trying to keep my head up and smile and support my husband through this.but alli want to do is run away and hide till the rough par tis over. im tired of strugalling all the time. i wish we could just get on with pur lives. Anyway i hope sunday will shead some light on why i feel so yucky all the time. little update on the baby front. still not pregnent though im sure its for the best. still alittle baby crazy. but am coping rather well...

Im tempting fait

Ok so the kids have been down for there nap now for almost 2 hours. And im am really tempting fait in the fact that i waited this long to decide to write. Ken and I are trying for our third. we have been trying sence january and i feel likeim the only one i know not preggers. I know heavenly father will bless us with our next one when were ready. BUt i feel ready now. Blame it on all the other people having kids. but my two just arnt babys anymore. and i miss that. Liam is finally walkign and hes learned how to sign so were able to know what he needs. Cohen is a bundel of energy and loves to talk all the time. He will be 3 in july. and hes seems much older. We went to see Horton heres a hue yesterday just the two of us. He loved it. Ken is losing his job at the end of june so we have been scrambaling to look for a new one. And ive been thinking this might be a good time to move to a bigger city. Maybe closer to the temple. I feel so lost right now. everythng is so up in the air with kens work, home, and the kids therapys. Liam is in the prosses of being tested for autism. and were all just trying to keep each other afloat. The great thing about the caos is that Everytime i look at ken i am so thankful for him. He honestly makes me cry when i look at him. I love him so much and know how much he loves me. I love my life with him no matter how hard it sometimes can be. I told himi loved him like twenty times last night LOL. Ive been really emotional latley. it is just the stress and the pressure that the kids therapys schedule puts on me. Im going all over town all week. Its going to rain the next few days and i love it. We have a really alful A/C unit and so by the end of the day the house is in the 80's without cooking. but this afternoon is is cool. June 1st marked the begin of hurricane season. Ken says im wired but i love hurricane season. I love weather in general. and if i were better at math i probally would of studied it. WoW been typing for 15 mins stilll no crying.. hmmm Anywho thats all for now.